My thoughts on money and relationships

Here are my thoughts about money, relationships, and everything else I’ve learned along the way – Enjoy! Add me on Instagram: GPStephan – LIMITED TIME: Get 2 FREE STOCKS ON WEBULL when you deposit $100 (Valued up to $1600): :



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I know this doesn’t have much to do with Investing – building wealth – or passive income – but finding a partner who thinks the same way can be incredibly important.

Here’s what I’ve come to realize over the years: You WILL ATTRACT what you think you’re worth and what you put out there, and how you portray yourself WILL have a direct affect on the type of people you meet and how they view you. This goes much further than just relationships, by the way – this includes friends, colleagues, business parters, and acquaintances – if you LEAD and ATTRACT people with flashy clothing, cars, and status – you WILL ATTRACT THE PEOPLE who are most receptive to those qualities.

Here’s what I’m getting at: if you want to meet someone who thinks the same way as you do, who shares those same beliefs…THAT’S what you need to make known from the very beginning. Be EXACTLY who you are, and don’t be apologetic about it…if you embrace exactly what you’re looking for, and you believe in what you’re doing…it’s going to make it THAT much easier to find someone else who thinks the exact same way.

I ALSO don’t think it’s unreasonable to place an emphasis on financial compatibility…I know money has previously been this topic that no one talks about because it’s not proper etiquette…but, I think it’s a very realistic component to any relationship, and logistically – when you’re in a serious relationship – you need to be upfront with how you plan to manage finances, and whether or not your long term goals will clash with each other.

And remember: this has NOTHING to do with how much money someone makes…I’ve seen people making $500,000 per year but they’re the most financially irresponsible people who constantly live paycheck to paycheck…just like I’ve seen people who make $25,000 per year and somehow manage to save half of their income.

This IS JUST about Financial Responsibility, and setting the expectation and framework upfront about what works with you and what doesn’t – generally, it’s important that both people have a positive, health attitude towards finances – and as long as there’s the emphasis towards working together towards a unified goal, how much money either person makes is largely irrelevant.

And listen…at the end of day, a relationship can bring an IMMENSE amount of joy into your life in so many immeasurable ways…but, it’s just as important to make sure you’re attracting the type of people who are RIGHT for you, and being totally UPFRONT with who you are, what you want, and what you expect – without purposely doing things “just to get in a relationship.” Ideally, I think it’s just as important to learn to be completely comfortable on your own, first, so that you can build the confidence of becoming self sufficient as a person…something like that just comes naturally, and everyone will move on their own timeline – there’s no rush, and it’s not a race.

Relationships are an incredible learning and growing experience as a person, and it’s NOT something to shy away from because you think money complicates things…but, learning how to showcase who you are and what you stand for is a quality that not only a future partner will appreciate, but will also help shape you into a more confident person in general. The sooner you get in the habit of doing this, the easier it will be in the future.

For business or one-on-one real estate investing/real estate agent consulting inquiries, you can reach me at

*Some of the links and other products that appear on this video are from companies which Graham Stephan will earn an affiliate commission or referral bonus. Graham Stephan is part of an affiliate network and receives compensation for sending traffic to partner sites. The content in this video is accurate as of the posting date. Some of the offers mentioned may no longer be available.

117 thoughts on “My thoughts on money and relationships

  1. Bumbumb dabumb Reply

    wait…. people don’t use grocery bags as trash bags? like there’s actually a bag you can buy? I thought that’s what it was. I even worked for an electrical company and their garbage bags in the main branch were grocery bags…. really!?

  2. José Hidalgo Vega Reply

    like buttoned

  3. Destiny's Room Reply

    I use grocery bags as trash bags lol. And I save the packets simply because I don’t like wasting things that definitely can be used. I wouldn’t mind a guy who does the same!

  4. Destiny's Room Reply

    “Sooner than later” I wish I would have understood that earlier!

  5. John Materne Reply

    Great video!

  6. Sun Dancer Reply

    You need to watch the Dave Ramsey show…..has couples groups…… for married people…….

  7. dethreveng Reply

    Love the video! I’m very money minded (maybe not as much as Graham but I’ve been living off $1k/mo and dwindling to save as much as possible), and my girlfriend at the time we met was not. Over the years she’s changed a lot when it comes to finances. I didn’t force her or even ask her to but she changed her spending because she wanted to. We both have our budgets and we both make funny decisions when it comes to buying things but we’ve grown together emotionally, physically and financially. She is absolutely wonderful and I’m so lucky to have her!

  8. C. ROBLES Reply

    was it weird timing ??

  9. Avinnash S Reply

    1:43 This is so relatable.

  10. Panikovskii Reply

    You are the most greedy person I have ever seen. No offense, simple fact. I am surprised to see hundreds of people in comments all using store bags as trash bags…It’s so inconvenient to level that it’s silly. WHY? Why buy a hair brush, you can brush your hair with your fingers just fine! Anyways..You are totally correct when you say it’s important to find someone who is just like you. But when you were digging through trash in that other guy’s (can’t remember his name) video and found a coffee maker, you were all excited, and your girlfriend was standing there kind of sad and embarrassed. I am not sure you are sharing these values exactly. I mean, it would be VERY hard to find someone AS tense as you are…In any case. Saving IS important, but it’s also important to LIVE and have experiences, have memories, you know? Yes, buying Gucci belt is stupid, but you can afford to travel the world! Try new exciting cuisine, buy best concert tickets, I don’t know, fly a helicopter for fun! And when you have kids? Yes, you can save and teach them to save. OR you can go to Home Depot and buy them a humongous Christmas Inflatable for $300 and make them the happiest they can ever be because they are kids, and no amount of brain wash would change that. Stop living like a dry apricot and blossom as a cherry tree in the spring! Treat your lady right for once! Geez, man…

  11. Camilo Ernesto Cadena Reply

    Thanks Graham.

  12. Dastrio Reply

    Here I am, with no girlfriend, no money…. Watching this video….

    • Nik's One Life Reply

      Dastrio Baby steps…😁

  13. Anne West Reply

    Great video dude. Ever since my husband and I started doing business with Deborah Pitts, it’s been non stop smiles looking at our portfolio, she’s doing a great job taking care of our investment and helping us finally achieve financial independence

    • Anne West Reply

      @Eric Townsend She’s in Georgia, USA. Pretty sure she handles clients all round the world. She actually has a lot of clients, you can see her portfolio online @ Deborahpitts dot ga

  14. Samantha Hoffman Reply

    Never thought that using grocery bags as trash bags were something unique 😂 they’re the perfect size!

  15. Money with Alex Reply

    It’s all about shared values in business and relationships. Real simple. 🤯

  16. Michael Howland Reply

    Great video dude. Ever since my wife and I started doing business with Deborah Pitts, it’s been non stop smiles looking at our portfolio, she’s doing a great job taking care of our investment and helping us finally achieve financial independence

    • Eric Townsend Reply

      Wow! That sounds great, happy for you. Where is she based? How can I reach her?

    • Michael Howland Reply

      @Eric Townsend She’s in Georgia, USA. Pretty sure she handles clients all round the world. You can see her portfolio online @ Deborahpitts dot ga

  17. Anna Kulakova Reply

    Life is too short for frugal guys 😹😹😹

  18. Womens Whork Reply

    As someone who went to law school thanks for explaining a pre nup this way! So many people think it’s a bad thing for women. It’s just a negotiation! Otherwise the state does it for you

  19. Bobo Jenkins Reply

    they are all gold diggers

  20. Christopher Reid[ young Minister] Reply

    Congratulations on your new relationship.

  21. Stefan Egger Reply

    Founder of YOUNG MONEY CASH MONEY bought a Bugatti thats how you do it

  22. Stefan Egger Reply

    Sure is so hard to find a girl when you are millionaire, the b*tches just wait for you lined up.

  23. jean premier Reply

    Lol @ the ending🤣🤣🤣

  24. pinkcichlid Reply

    What’s wrong with using grocery bags as garbage bags? Reuse is about being environmental not money.

    • Clod Solis Reply

      They tend to be thinner than garbage bags and often have holes in them from use, causing liquids to seep through.

    • davidhunternyc Reply

      The problem with grocery bags is that are often torn and the leaks and spillage from them are gross. Yes, reuse grocery bags for dry items but don’t use them for wet trash.

    • wahahabuh Reply

      obviously you don’t just use a single torn one. If you have a torn one, combine it with another torn one and as long as the holes are not in the same spot it’s perfectly fine. I put wet trash in all the time and it’s never a problem.

      Obviously you can’t dump an actual bucket of liquid into it. But leftover sauce from a pot or fruit cores or wet tissue that you used to wipe stuff up etc those are all perfectly fine.

    • Angelchildxx Reply

      Unfortunately in some places, for example where I live, if you do that they won’t pick up your trashes as you are supposed to use specific plastic bags for each garbage (plastic/paper/waste/etc.) and you can also get a fine if you use a different one.

    • Lissy Bookbinder Reply

      @wahahabuh My family too. I grew up with saving tips, and we always used grocery bags. We used grocery bags as trash bags so much that it just seemed “normal” to me. However to others, it does not seem normal! But oh well.

  25. Danielle Gore Reply

    Love the end 😂😂 You guys are so cute !❤️❤️

  26. Trent Belleville Reply

    I am a 20 year old college student. I started watching your videos when I was around 16 or 17 and the day I turned 18 I opened up a brokerage account and by 19 I made my first deposit into a Roth IRA. You are so inspirational to kids like me. Who love finance, credit cards and anything to do with money. Over my brokerage and Roth I generate over 500 dollars a year from passive income and something you said stuck with me. “Once you make your first dollar in passive income, it becomes addictive and you just want more.” I tell my friends this all the time and even got some looking to invest now. Your influence goes beyond your subscribers on this channel. Every-time you post I can almost promise I’m one of the first to view it! Once again, I love what you do and and really try and model myself after you!!
    Trent Belleville

  27. Madi Reply

    i could listen to him read the dictionary – his logic is so comforting

  28. Bunny Unicorn520 Reply

    Yup Yours/Hers/Ours. Better to work all that out in advance. Start a new life and account together. Tip if a woman can’t pronounce Louboutin she is the type that will be wearing them , a chav. Great video and hope you two go well seems like a good fit

  29. Nabil Kania - Share Your Growth Reply

    Ur gf is sweet and pretty Graham. It’s so cool that she is wise with money also. I think u 2 make a great team and will remain togther for a long time.

  30. Jon Doe Reply

    5:05 you know dam well u lyin sayin u seen someone live off 10 -15 k a year

  31. Cyn Gli Reply

    A pretty nup is really important not just for the future but to bring up the important discussion of finances. When you begin dating there is usually a tendency to want to impress the other person and give unrealistic expectations of what life together might be like. And that’s yet another reason not to jump in with both feet after a few months of dating. I’ve seen this over and over one person spends recklessly and the other person is in constant anxiety worrying about the car payment or whatever. If you’re afraid to talk about money you shouldn’t be getting married because that’s a huge part of life as a couple. My 2 cents.

  32. Mike Reply

    I hope Graham realizes that everything changes when you get married. I hope Graham isn’t suckered into a marriage lol.

  33. kerkko kettula Reply

    I live in Finland and i think everyone in here uses their grocery bags as their trash bags😂
    And its not like we are poor country it just makes sense!

    • Paulina Reply

      I live in Mexico, we do the same! Well … not as much now since most places don’t give plastic bags anymore, we have to take reusable bags or manage everything in your arms 😅

  34. Joshua Tang Reply

    I want to see grahams wedding because I want to see the things he cheaps out and the things he spends on

    • afrikurl Reply

      He’ll get the whole thing sponsored and monetized.

  35. Dain Bramage Reply

    Graham is dating Graham.

  36. Add - J Reply

    The answer is a prenup

  37. Clod Solis Reply

    Graham sounds like Nick Lucid of the Science Asylum.

  38. Clod Solis Reply

    “What you see is what you get” sounds like “judging a book by its cover”

  39. Clod Solis Reply

    If you think a pre-nup will protect you, you should watch Joshua Fluke’s video on why he won’t get married again. It’s very easy for a woman to get around a pre-nup.

  40. Lucky Reply

    Man these videos are annoyingly edited to death.
    Try looking at beau of the fifth videos.
    One take. Only 5 minutes long.
    No commercials.
    Just a thought.

  41. afrikurl Reply

    He said her name.🤯

  42. - David - Reply

    Finding a woman with a healthy financial mindset is quite hard though. Research has shown that women are much bigger spenders than men, they also spend more often and they have more debt – and have debt more often.

  43. eviewhy Reply

    who doesn’t use grocery bags as trash bags tho??????

  44. razz P Reply

    so prenup or no prenup?

  45. trip zuco Reply

    Guys why is graham plblinking help me in morse code??

  46. plaid13 Reply

    A prenup should be required for every couple that get married that have a combined net worth over 50k. Far too often men lose everything that they had before getting married.

  47. Steve Blobs Reply

    I wonder if you give any money to charity. My guess is no.

  48. JPavilion 2 Reply

    9:04 and you can get health insurance as little as 5 minutes when you Apple Pay for it !

    Oh just kidding that’s MeetKevin

  49. Jenny Wu Reply

    Lmao my bf is the yolo type and I’m the early retirement type haha

    • Inject Ideas Reply

      you need a new man

  50. Photo Girl Reply

    I used to think prenups were anti-love, but now I believe they’re the most loving thing you can do for yourself and your partner.

  51. Photo Girl Reply

    LOLOL omg that ending. Perfect for all the peeps in the comments who constantly say she’s using you for your money/making you spend lololol.

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  53. family account Reply

    1:55 I’d actually really like that. I mean, my parents have always used grocery bags as trash bags so I never saw it as a weird thing. I just thing frugality, to some extent, can be attractive. Not extreme cheapskate drinking my piss kinda frugal, but the kind that doesn’t see the point in spending someone’s salary on overpriced, and not even that tasty coffee that is if coffee is even a part of it anymore.

  54. davidhunternyc Reply

    Graham, you’re a hotbox. I mean you’re not as hot as MeetKevin but you’re hot, so hot. The hot girls are throwing themselves at you not because you’re wealthy but because you’re hot.

  55. davidhunternyc Reply

    What about shared bank accounts? My parents had shared bank accounts. My father said, “I make the money. Your mother spends it.” It’s a relationship that worked. Conversely, my brother is married and they have separate bank accounts. Over the years he’s become quite wealthy and has become selfish too. He won’t give his wife money for groceries to feed the family. He is supposed to pay the mortgage but he kicks the can down the road. This relationship is a mess and money is a part of it.

  56. purplepoppy07 Reply

    So much misogyny in the comments section.

  57. Dee BROWN Reply

    You deserve better. Your a phenomenal man. I wish you would have met someone before you had money.

  58. Mario Aguilar Reply

    Money keeps relationship that’s my thinking don’t really know

  59. Sarah Sanusi Reply

    All men’s value goes up when they have money. 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • Zander Santillan Reply

      Find a man who makes money and who wants you at the same time🤷🏽‍♂️

  60. MVProfits Reply

    I watched more for curiosity but left impressed by some of it LOL

  61. Xana Mills Reply

    This was some brilliant motivational speaking

  62. Suba Shadiq Reply

    Thanks for making this video. If you can make more videos like a break up, control your emotions, and move forward

  63. Michael Do Reply

    Jeremy, Andre, Kevin, you would do a great CNBC-style youtube talk show host at your house or Jeremy’s when its built. very exciting stuff. You guys have built up a huge following which I am sure watch each other’s channel. I have been thinking about about starting an investment channel and posting a video, referencing all 4 of you guys. I will keep a dinosaur on my desk, purple vest, jeremy’s hat, and a pack of playing cards on my table as my low key reference to you guys.

  64. Donald Mickunas Reply

    Graham, do some research. Lots of guys hook up with the girl of their dreams. 10 years later, she has become the girl of their nightmares. She files for divorce and takes just about everything. The law is not on the side of men. Please research this BEFORE you go any further with this girl.

  65. Anders Walker Reply

    In order to make profits in the stock market, one has to have a good strategy and proper knowledge of how the holders manipulate the market.

    • Raymond Bull Reply

      I started investing with Mr Charles when i was in England, i keep making consistent profits with him.

    • Rebecca Willson Reply

      @Anders Walker How do i get in touch with this broker?

    • Benjamin Lucas Reply

      Mr Charles Connor isn’t just good, he has years of experience in the market which gives him an edge over other brokers.

    • Anders Walker Reply

      @Rebecca Willson Here, you can go write him at {}

    • Jackson Rodriguez Reply

      Stock trading is very profitable especially when you have an expert handling your trades, you just earn from the comfort of your home.

  66. Tejas Reply

    You gotta buy trash bags Graham

  67. 87 Seconds - Short Educational Videos Reply

    I’ve never met anybody who doesn’t use grocery bags as garbage bags

  68. stana7x Reply

    For the algorithm!! 🙂

  69. Janky_Vagaries Reply

    ‘You’ll attract what you think you’re worth and what you put out there. And how you portray yourself will have a direct effect on the type of people you meet and how they view you’.

  70. TheVitalover Reply

    It is god dang difficult to find a woman who has her financial priorities together. Usually women in their early to mid 20s are all about self gratification until they realize time is running out.

  71. Oh Long Johnson Reply

    I’m from Mercer County in PA. If you don’t use plastic bags as trash cans there is something wrong with you. The joy of living in a low income area.

  72. JohnEnergy2012 Reply

    If you don’t pay, they don’t stay… period.

  73. Meghan Huynh Reply

    Can you do I️ video about combining finances with your partner?

  74. The River Life Reply

    I’d smash that like button any day.

  75. Reply

    I get it to be frugal in general is a good thing to some extent, although at one point you just gotta live and enjoy the freedom that accumulated wealth offers you. But one thing I can’t figure out is doing laundry in the off-peak hours to save pennies on the power bill and saving the condiment packs to save money on buying condiments (again a nominal amount), and using grocery bags as trash bags, … such constraints, … but then buying a very nice but overpriced abode (approx. $378/sq.ft. is very high for Las Vegas as $275/sq.ft. in the current market is already on the high side unless you’re in the Ridges, etc.) in Las Vegas without a Strip view with a comparatively small backyard for this type of property and price. You could get so much more for $1,440,000.
    Of course it’s smart to move to Las Vegas with no State income tax, no inheritance tax, no inventory tax, etc., much lower property taxes and lower car insurance premiums, etc. vs. California, and so much other great things that Nevada offers.
    That’s what folks from California don’t get as they don’t know the Las Vegas market, they could buy exceptional residential properties including new construction in Las Vegas at real bargain prices, especially when compared to California, but then they bid up the Las Vegas market by paying unreal prices on the high side for their new homes here in Las Vegas.

  76. Lukas E. Reply

    “You are the sum of all your actions and it’s of important to take responsibility for the decisions you made” Graham calling me out for watching his videos instead of studying for my next upcoming exam

  77. Snafu Reply

    People who waste money are one of my biggest turn offs.
    People who save money are one of my biggest turn on.
    But people who smash the like button? ERMAHGERD!

  78. Kidney Care Coaching Reply

    I really respect how you answered the prenup question without.

  79. Joey Danahy Reply

    I’d tap that… like button.

  80. FatGuy Reply

    I want a “How I got married for 0 dollars” video

  81. Olena Bondarenko Reply

    Appreciate your effort to help ppl with financial advices and information.
    Very true that person should willing to change the financial behavior. I’m so grateful for my partner as he showed me the way to save even in low income situations and by the time pass it’s become a habit.
    Wish everyone start saving and investing in the young age.
    Thank you again for job you are doing!!! 🙏🏻🙌🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  82. Sarah Fisch Reply

    I’ve learned more life skills on Grahams channel than in school.

  83. will green Reply

    This guys voice is smoothing

  84. Mikey Slice Reply

    Graham, I’ve been watching a lot of your videos to get an idea of how you keep my attention so well. I have ADHD, so that’s worth looking into for me to improve my own videos.

    I’ve noticed that you zoom in once every 10 seconds or so, and change the scene through a visual aid or by cutting to a separate setting entirely. Do you record the entire video twice from different settings? Could you please send me a sample of one of your scripts?

    I’m sure you have a file containing how you’d like your videos to be edited and the process of how you gather visual aids. Could you please send me those too? My email is in your IG DMs If there’s anything I can do to return the favor I’d be more than willing to do that first before you send these files.

    I like that you show a screen recording of a past video at the beginning of your videos as well. Then lead into why you think this video should be made because of the questions that arose from that video. I also like that you have a higher pitch voice at the beginning of your sentences and a downward inflection at the end of your sentences. I really like that you pull your audience in by saying that this video is answering their questions!

    After you’ve hooked your audience you prove to them why they need to watch this video by listing reasons and sneaking in liking the video. I might make a video about breaking this video down into what a YouTuber sees vs what most people see. Would you be okay with me using this video in that video? I’d love to help other YouTubers make great videos that hold viewer’s attention throughout videos longer than 10 minutes. Please let me know if I have your permission to use this video in that video. I’d love to make it!

    I sent part of this comment as a message to your DMs on IG too. Refer to your DMs for my email. I left it out so that this comment doesn’t go to the spam section. Thank you for taking the time to read this comment. I look forward to your response. Thanks in advance!

  85. mike smith Reply

    I am not saying money is what got graham his gf but money can be an attractive trait in the sense it can show other attractive traits like ambition, discipline, organization, proper planning ect. That being said homeboy does have money and can date woman that let him do butt stuff.

  86. Pat T Reply

    Let your freak flag fly and you will attract someone that like it!

  87. Lissy Bookbinder Reply

    I use grocery bags as trash bags too!!! My boyfriend and I store them each time after we go to the market into a recycling wire basket.

  88. Nevin X Reply

    the phrase “Fundamentally if you see flaws in a person that youre trying to fix in order for them to fit the mould of exactly what youre looking for, then their probably not right for you, that just kinda hit like a truck and sums up my whole dating experience dating a bunch of people I see so much potential in if theyd just work on a few things but they dont want it for themselves

  89. O Yildirim Reply

    jeez i cant stop but to think that timing between posting hes single and finding a girlfriend is not a coincidence, and not in a good way tbh…make sure she loves you for you man not because youre successful….youre a good guy and I wont want anyone taking advantage of that

  90. xovickyvu Reply

    and here i thought every was doing laundry during off peak electrical hours…

  91. twistedblktrekie Reply

    For smaller trash cans, grocery bags are the perfect fit. However, you still need the normal-sized ones for larger trash cans that go in the kitchen, for example.

  92. Luis C Reply

    New app idea… Frugal Dating!

  93. Michael Gary Scott Reply

    In my country, it’s unusual to NOT have a prenup. It’s helpful when buying properties in separate names or registering a business in separate names

  94. Andrei Reply

    “as fun as it is to smash the like button, sometimes you want to smash something else”

  95. Andrei Reply

    Usually guys think about how to make money and be more respected in their society. Women tend to focus more on how to get a high value man. They don’t necessarily look for your money but they feel attracted by calculated, independent and respected individuals who can afford something nice, have good taste, etc. Be very mindful of how powerful this mechanism is and super picky after all, once in a marriage, she’s is going to be able to take at least half whenever she feels she wants out no matter who’s decision is it.

  96. miva93HP Reply

    A man’s money is non o a woman’s business and vice versa

  97. Ángela James Reply

    Groceries bags meant to be trash bags what are you talking about? Are you telling me that americans just throw away their groceries bags?

  98. Paul Rail Reply

    These continue to be some of the most important life lessons that the vast majority of us are NOT taught growing up.

  99. Mert Furkan Sezgin Reply

    Ehehe, the things that u r doing to save money, it’s already a cultural fact here in my country 😅 i never saw mom using smth except than the grocery pocket for the garbage in my life 🤣

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